i think i’ve got a new approach to this: if i take and reference “my depression” as this irrational, attached creature, maybe he’ll be outed and shamed out of existence. if i am constantly aware of this lurking pothole in my mind, perhaps it can be avoided and i can squelch the floods before they gush. i need a little man on my shoulder to box me on the ears when he gets out of line. the monster can and will be defeated.

i think this marks the realization that it is no longer my life that needs to change but simply the way i go about it.